Throughout my life I’ve had people confide in me. I’ve been told I’m easy to talk to and that I am a good listener. I’ve never really given it much thought. I enjoy encouraging people, so, I’ve been happy to help.
There comes a time, however, when enough is enough. I’m not the catchall for all problems. I do not have a sign indicating that I am open for business 24/7 to hear about what some might consider mistreatment. I’m also not the person to vent to (just because).
I realize that we all have challenges to face. We, at times, must deal with unpleasant circumstances. Our approach to these situations could make all the difference in the world. Why would you want to call me to complain about being hung up on because you yelled at or cussed someone out? If you are disrespectful to people, it’s only natural that people will treat you as though you are diseased. They will want to stay as far away from you as possible.
I had someone try to complain to me about having to continuously repeat what they said when dealing with someone who has Alzheimer’s. Seriously? Have you considered writing things down so that there’s no need for repetition?
Why complain to me about the payments you now have to make for a purchase that you knew you didn’t need and couldn’t afford? You knew when you went in to the store that you didn’t have the money to spend. Now, your purchase is going to collect dust with all the other unused purchases.
Honestly, sometimes we are our own worst enemy. We allow things to get to us. When we are mad at ourselves for something that we caused, we don’t think twice about “sharing” our moodiness. We can even get mad at an individual for being happy all the time. I recall working with someone who would walk into the office whistling every day. She would say hello to everyone and offer them a wish to have a great day. I was dumbfounded, when, one day a colleague of ours complained about the whistling and the cheery disposition and the supervisor asked the “happy” colleague to cease and desist.
So, I’m recommending that individuals take a good look at the situation that they are in. If you are stressed, walk away. Table any discussion until you have your emotions under control. If the situation that you are facing is something that you can control, will have an impact on, or can cause an effect, then that’s ok. If, however, you can’t control the situation, won’t impact the outcome or can’t effect the situation, then leave it alone. Don’t engage in any conversations about anything that doesn’t concern you.
Understand, that I will always make myself available to you in your time of need. I will continue to lend an ear, and offer encouragement. I will NOT, however, be your personal dumping ground. The doors to the complaint department are closed. I will re-open for business when your outlook is receptive to positive feedback and conducive to personal change.