My sister and I were discussing personality changes that we’ve each experienced throughout our lives. During the discussion, my sister commented that as she continues to age, she has gotten very quiet. I laughed at this and responded with how easy she can become irritated and develop an “attitude”. Her comment back to me was that her friends think she is very quiet.
That comment provided me with an “aha moment”. A few things came to mind related to perceptions. Do we act one way with family and a different way with friends? Are family members “stuck” in how they perceive us? Will they ever forget the old and recognize the new and improved version of you?
I had to question my mindset. Was I judging my sister based on my childhood memories? After all, don’t I know her better than her friends?
I began thinking about the changes in my life. I didn’t like it when people expected me to act or be a certain way. I wanted to be me. At times I resisted the feedback that was being provided. As I grew older, there were changes I wanted to make in my life. As I grew in wisdom and discernment, how I handled situations, how I reacted to different life lessons that I encountered, transformed me into having a change in my attitude.
As a young rebellious teen, I didn’t care what others thought of me, however, I sure had an opinion of how I thought you should be. My perceptions of others were always accurate (at least in my mind). Is that what I was doing with my sister? Do I still have blind spots?
I was comfortable with how I viewed my sister. I hadn’t considered that just as I made changes so had she. I had to acknowledge that it is possible that others recognized things about my sister that I hadn’t noticed.
Changing my old perceptions will benefit both my sister and I. I don’t want to be stuck, nor do I want to be judgmental. I want to celebrate the progress she has made in bettering her life. I thank her for revealing a character flaw that can be corrected.
How about you? Are you stuck in old perceptions? If so, let go of your expectations of how others should be. You’ll be glad you did.